Ardour

For some people, like myself, for example, beginnings are a culmination of two things: an opening for a fresh start or  the gaping hole, that is, something not nearly good enough, or worse; a failure. The thought that you could put every piece of you into something and have it not be enough, or still fail to meet the mark in some sense. The idea that something that once gave you comfort would now be taken away from you; that you’d be leaving it behind. Something you once sought refuge in, a person, a place and even a state of mind; they change. If I’ve learnt anything at all amidst my meager 15 years of existence, it is that nothing is certain. We live each day with endless prospects and possibilities, and it can be difficult to try and take any step towards a change in any form. We do not know what tomorrow brings. We fear change in certain aspects of our lives. It is a fear that lives even in most indomitable of hearts. With that very same fear, however, comes a choice; you either take the leap, with all the risks and possibilities, and you move forward, or you stay in the same walk of life that you’ve always been in. You can fit into the neat little boxes that you’ve created for yourself, or that society has created for you and remain comfortable. Yet something within you longs for more. There is a flame within all of us that ignites at the promise of change and for some, it blazes brighter than others. At times, life pushes us into change, so we are forced to face the fear in our beginnings; to look at our fears in the eye.

Yet, when we seek our beginnings instead of letting them seek us, we break free from the chain of the monotony that lingers within our daily lives; we let ourselves be seen for who we are. We can overcome; we can write our own destinies. We only truly live in the moments in our lives when we choose not to be satisfied with what people tell us we’re supposed to be satisfied with. When we embrace the uncertainty entangled in our lives, we begin.

So breathe out the fear, just as easily as you once breathed it in. Let your beginning empower you and every other soul you touch. Let it change you and set you free, regardless of the outcome. Let every flicker of the flame ripen to a conflagration; every fall which you thought you could not rise from, be a reminder of what you’ve endured. Beginnings take strength; carry yourself with the knowledge that while everything around you will be ever-changing; evolving, you know who you are, and no beginning will ever be able to change your perception of you.

Written by Trisha Ajila

Edited by Arya Anagol

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